Early Morning Rant :)))

Some people would think that I have all the time in the world. Being a hands-on mum, can be really draining at times, if not all the time. It's like a 24 hour job, with no commendations, recognitions, and incentives :( :) Its a bitter sweet feeling being me, Sweet because I am with Alexander every step of the way. Id rather be with
him, tutor him and all, than rely on others to do that for me. Plus, he is closer to me and we both develop that certain kind of longing for each other that only mothers and childrens have. Bitter, because of the fact that Im developing these personal frustrations. Being a mum, keeps me from doing what 24 year old people do. Work/career, travel etc..

But whenever I see mums like me, still having the "life" that Im trying to have, I get inspired a lot. They are mums just like me, and/but they are busy with other income generating activities, tho some dont have full time jobs. They have a social life, unlike that of a single person ofcourse. And they still can travel and do all of it.
What is it that they have that I don't? Its having your own family with you. Having your own mother with you makes you feel more relaxed and yourself. You can say and do whatever you want to do, without worrying of what others might say or think about you, that is unnecessary stress. Staying with your in-laws can be stressful at times. Because you need/must deal with them before you deal with your own. Sometimes you got to have their permissions even if its not necessary. And what burns me, is the fact that you can't leave the house without informing everybody. And sometimes creating a scene, very unnecessary and immature and insensitive and inconsiderate.

I ask myself all the time, until when will I stay this way?

Problematic   **Photo Source

Although I am still grateful to have them around, Im still not 100% comfortable and at ease.

Again, its a matter of having the courage to stand up for what you want. And the will to act on it and make it work not only for yourself, but for your child and the people around. While you're still with them. 

And then, you take it from there. As for myself, I have to start working on something, a day job, night job, whatever it is that would work, considering my situation and the environment Im in. And this puts me to thinking of having a yaya/nanny for Alex. This is a first for me and baby, he is turning 3 in a couple of months now. Yey!! :))

* This is me trying to convince myself again :)) Courage where are you?
Ill let you know if things would work out as i planned in my mind :))

Adios everyone and have good day!! :))


P.S. (Pahabol Sentence)

We/I should  be thankful of the things that I have right now, and just make the most out of it. Stop ranting, and just make it good. Sure there will be complications and adjustments at first, but it'll all be worth it. Dont always think of the people around, as the culprits, instead think of them as the hurdles, benches, floors, streets that you have to plank on. LOL :)) "Happy thoughts you guys!"

applegrace :))